The story that I tell, and it's all true, of when I came up with the actual idea of YoYo, the app to help people get in relationships and, you know, stay in relationships and everything that comes with that was about 3 years ago, this week, last week, August 2023. I was firmly set in grad school in LA, and I went out on a date that night with a very lovely person whose name and profession I'm going to keep out of it for privacy concerns. I'm just going to refer to her that way indirectly as her or the woman to coin from Sherlock Holmes. That's what I'll do. Should be my Irene Adler, but way less villainy. She's a great person. Anyway. Yeah, the woman or her, whichever one sounds less abrasive in 2026, even though I do like Sherlock Holmes. Just getting sidetracked here, and I'm going to include this because it shows my transparentness and lack of preparedness. These answers are all authentic, even if they are prepared ahead of time. So the moment I knew is I'm on the date with this with the woman, and actually it's ending. We're in the car and we're on the way back from the Hollywood Bowl. We just saw the live John Williams thing with the music for Return of the Jedi. And she got sick in the car, she wasn't feeling great. She got sick in the car, threw up in the car. And then got dropped off, and I apologized profusely to our driver, and he had a great attitude about it. He couldn't have been nicer. He said, don't worry about it. It's totally fine. And then he went on to tell me that he hadn't been on a date in a long time, so it was kind of cool to, like, see us interacting because a lot of people would just sit in the car quietly and we were talking about the show and the food and, you know, like, reviewing it.
It wasn't our first date, so we had a rapport going. And he liked it. You know, he liked that connection and I totally get that. Prior to some background knowledge. Prior to the idea for the app itself, I come from academia. I did a lot of school for a long time. And so I was gearing up to be a professor, an educator, and I was like, oh, I'll do a course. You know, I see people struggling with this. And, not to toot my own horn or hoist my own flag or humble brag or whatever. But I mean, I have the receipts and not from the restaurants, but I have the notification receipts from Bumble and CMB. I never use Tinder the culture of the hookup thing, but I have the receipts of the amount of notifications and matches that I would get every day. And it was not insignificant, you know? So I was achieving success. And I am not Brad Pitt. And conversely, I have a story that leads into this one where a few nights before I went out with the woman. I went to a friend's restaurant in Venice Beach. He owns and operates it as a chef there. And I was telling him, you know, just catching up on life and we were there with a few friends. We started talking about relationships. He was going through a breakup. And I told him, you know, like, it's a great time. Dating apps are solid. You're a handsome guy, you've got money. You're gonna you're gonna crush it, you know? It's the world's your oyster kind of thing. You'll do great. And he's like, no, I'm really bad at those. And I'm like, why? And he told me that, even if he gets matches based on looks or, you know, there is a look gate. I'm not going to sugarcoat that. We try to get around that with YoYo using the plan to showcase effort, but traditional dating apps, it's the profile photos, the first thing that hits your eyes. That's what determines the engagement or pass. It's a look gate.
And he is good looking, so he would get matches. You know, like he takes care of himself and that's on everybody to take care of himself. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Health is not. You can at me or not, I stand by that 100%. You can be beautiful at any size. You are not healthy at any size and health inadvertently is attractive. People don't look at a dying horse and be like, wow, that's beautiful, but when a horse is running through the field and is strong and is healthy and is fast, people are like, wow, that looks like cinema or art. Just throwing that out there while I look at my copy of Da Vinci's models. Anyway, that's so pretentious. Don't care. It doesn't matter. Yeah, so he struggled. And he was the quintessential should be succeeding in the Los Angeles dating market. And I asked him why, and he said it was because he doesn't know what to say. He's really bad at texting. He doesn't know how to take initiative. And so I told him what I do, what I told you about the first message, that format that YoYo is built on, and now, Coming back to our story with the woman after she's dropped off of her apartment, and I'm apologizing to the driver, and he gives me that tidbit of knowledge about not being on a date in a while. I was like, Oh my gosh, like what's your problem? You know, like he's also not a bad looking guy. He's driving us around in a nice car, an Uber black, spoiler alert, whatever, you know? Come at me again because it's 2026 and everyone's got a problem with everything. But yeah, like, it doesn't matter, but it is relevant to the story because it symbolizes he has enough money for that tier of ride and that service with the money he's making. So again, he should be one of the people performing as data and he's not. He's like, I don't know what to say.
And I told him verbatim, my dude, this is what you say. And just like I told you for the first message, I won't repeat it, but I gave him that formula, because that's exactly what it is, and he literally replied, can I write that down? Can you take a picture of that and send it to me? That's amazing. He never thought about it. And neither did my friend that owned the restaurant. Both smart guys. They never thought about it. So I went home that night and I thought, okay, I've done all this work, all this outlining, all this course and section material prep, and I'm gonna have it in grids. We're gonna have 9 modules and chapters. I'm gonna give homework and people are gonna grow and all this stuff. I was like, what if I just make an app that does that for you? That's much easier than educating people, even people that want to learn, have busy lives, which, you know, directly. Adversely affects their ability to commit time to learning new things. Yeah. So, Having an app that does that for you sounds way simpler. The problem is, I studied philosophy, and history, and digital history, and, and, and, and, and, and, and intellectual history, and the study of ideas, so I know how to read a lot. And I know how to write, but I don't know how to write computer code of any kind, and I don't know how to design apps. I know nothing about them. And from that moment, I registered the first LLC in California, like, like, I think maybe that night or the next night, and I started taking quotes on having people that could build the app for me. This is getting way too long. They could build the F for me, and they all were found to be, let's just say, wanting for lack of a better word. I found them all insufficient to my needs. And I was very fortunate and very graceful. I was very fortunate, very lucky, not graceful.
I was graceful with the responses, yes, and my praise, but I was very fortunate that people took the time to help me. And they didn't sit down and give me coding lessons, but like, they pointed me in the right direction. They were like, have you heard of this? I was like, no, they're like, Oh yeah, you should read about that and you should learn how to do that. Okay. And so I did. And then that led to the next and the next. And now we're live on the App Store 3 years later and I built it all myself. What up? But that's a whole longer journey. We're going to speed through these other points just to get the content out. Number two, Tokyo and being wrong is what it says here. And then it references my self-own from the first and subsequently in the second point, which is not a self-own. It's just a realization, it's the fact. And I wouldn't say Tokyo was wrong. I chose it intentionally. I thought it was the market that was the hardest to break into. I have a friend that is from Taiwan, that is married to a Japanese lady, and he's lived there for several years, and he told me that the Japanese market is very special and specifically focuses on Japan first and the world second. So if you break in there, you're in. It's also the place where population is hit the most, and romance is by dating and marriage rates and birth rates are hit the hardest. Now it's South Korea, but when I went, it was there. So I thought, okay, I'm going to go to the hardest market that needs it the most, and if I can make it there, I can make it anywhere. So I like to do hard things because I think it makes it easier downstream. I wasn't wrong. I was just woefully ignorant and underprepared, which was kind of a superpower. The ignorant, not the underprepared, because when you're ignorant of how hard something is going to be, and people tell you, you're like, yeah, it doesn't really matter and you just keep doing it. People call you brave, really, you're just ignorant.
I won't say stupid. Really, you're just ignorant. Don't know. And then, in my case, by the time I found out how hard it was going to be, I'd already committed so much time and so much effort and so much resources that to stop, was not an option. And that powered me through when ignorance no longer was viable. But I should have done my homework first. I was wrong to not do that. And thankfully the lovely, brilliant female citizens of Tokyo and Japan. Let me know. They told me, and I heard them, and I built on that. And now I have an app that addresses both markets complementary and independently. So thank you. Wouldn't exist without your feedback. All that is non-personal. I hold no grudges. I come from academia. Red ink is a good sign. It's the mark that you're getting better. Number three, the decision that cost me something. Well, deciding to switch from doing a course in tandem to grad school and full on replace grad school with instead of learning about different areas of history and logic and how to publish doctoral papers, how to build mobile apps and webpages and the associated syntax, languages, functions, operations. And just I could literally spend hours going over just all of the minute terms that are used for each of the different inputs and fields that add up to what you see on your phone before I even told you anything. I just would say a bunch of word salad. Anyway, it's a lot. It was a lot. It cost me, I don't want to be dramatic, but it cost me pretty much everything, but I gained a lot of amazing experiences. You know, I lived in Japan for 3 years. I traveled around the world. Not everybody gets to do that. I did. And everywhere I went, I was able to apply what I saw to YoYo, what is the dating market, what are the restaurants, what are the activities, what is the culture? That all contributes into what I saw, particularly Japan.
That's where I spent the most time. But yeah, definitely has cost me a lot. And that is why I'm just going to be upfront with you. These things exist to make money. So right now we are free. But the service that we provide you, it does cost me to run. I'm not complaining. If I could go back to that night and tell myself exactly what would happen, beat for beat, at each phase for the next three years, the good, the bad, and everything in between, I would make the same choice. I wouldn't trade it for anything, truly. I will add, for our readers to take to heart though, I listened to all the motivational hype reels on Instagram and YouTube when I first got going, and heard smart, successful people say how hard this life was, especially in the beginning, but sort of never ending until it pays off, if it pays off. And again, ignorance was a superpower, because I shrugged it off like it can't be that hard. It is that hard, and harder than words can describe, in all ways and all times, 24/7, and it never shuts off. You just start operating at a higher baseline of stress, but it's always there. I have a number in mind where I tell myself I'll feel secure enough it turns off, but not there yet, so I'll update this when I hit it and let you know. But something tells me it still lingers after you hit whatever self-declared "safe conditions," because as your experience and knowledge grow, so too does your understanding of just how truly impossible it is, and how amazing, brilliant, and outright just lucky 99.9% of those people were. Yes, hard work, persistence, smarts, grit, all the things, yes, but you can build those. Those are built by discipline and habit, not luck. Luck is random. Tom Cruise says you have to create that luck, will it into existence. I would adapt that to, you have to be constantly preparing, evolving, vigilant, and available, so that when an opportunity presents itself through circumstance and seemingly unrelated events that culminate in that moment we may or may not label after the fact as a lucky break, depending on how it plays out, we are prepared to act in that moment. The creation of that moment though, at every step of its chain, rests completely outside of your control. No matter how hard you prepare for a meeting with Tom Cruise, there is nothing you can do to will that meeting into existence without breaking multiple privacy and stalking statutes, whatever your jurisdictional region may be, and even then, if you try to stalk him in CA and he's in London, out of luck. Don't stalk people is the takeaway. It's illegal and not worth it. The point though, seriously, is not to complain, because I view myself as blessed to have had the experiences that I have had as a direct result of choosing this path, and I would not trade them. I also, if possible, just want to be real and say it is the hardest thing in the world no matter what facet of entrepreneurship you choose. So if anyone ever does read this, I want to be clear I am rooting for you to succeed and I wish you all the luck in the world. You're going to need it, literally all of it, and even then probably like 5%. Anyway, back to the main storyline, the YoYo story, progression then to now. But what I'm trying to get at is we provide value for you. The services that we do, the reservations, the venue, the butterfly mode for if your confidence isn't there, the tools to get you there, the automation, the design, the time, the effort. If you wanted to start right now from scratch, and build that yourself, it would also cost you a lot. And probably a cost that you don't want to pay, whether it's financial or in hours invested to learn how to do it yourself. Even with the coding tools that are out now which were not available to me 3 years ago. Nowhere near and really are still not there the ways that you would think. I read on sidebar. I read on LinkedIn, someone that I know and I respect she started a new company and she started building her app from scratch on Lovable. She thought it was going to take a weekend. It took her 3 weeks because she's never done it before. So she doesn't know how to frame her prompts and her responses. These things are a tool. They are a representation of how good the tool wielder is just like a paintbrush is a tool for an artist. If you don't know the right words to instruct your tool, It's going to give you results that are not what you intend and that you do not understand so that when things break and they will, you don't know how to fix it. So no, you still need a human behind it. It's a great tool. It speeds things up. It does not replace, it enhances.
It will replace eventually because it's getting better, but not today, not right now. Anyway, so it's cost me quite a bit. But it's okay. I've loved every minute of it. I really don't I really don't mind. I wouldn't have it any other way. Wouldn't take it back. The failure that I didn't hide. I've done about 300 app updates from over the last 3 years and the app has been live on the store since May and now with both modes for about a week or a day. Actually, it came out yesterday. I just submitted it a week ago. Each one of those builds failed before they all were addressing failures that contributed to a success. So, You know, I don't hide any of that. Why two countries and what you're actually building toward. Okay, so this is the 4th thinking one. I love Japan. I loved it when I was a kid. Call me a stereotype, but I watched a lot of anime and we played Yu-Gi-Oh when we were in middle school. I always loved that country and the culture and the music and the pop and the things that I saw. And when I thought, as stated earlier, about which area would be the most difficult to go and integrate as a foreigner with this app with this problem, it jumped out instantly to me. I briefly thought about South Korea because the metrics were there too, but I didn't have the cultural bond that I did from childhood. So it was Japan, no-brainer, and, I learned a lot about myself going through their immigration system and getting integrated there and getting an apartment there and healthcare and pension, and you have to learn a completely different set of skills and registering a company and talking to attorneys. And I went there when I couldn't read, write or speak Japanese, and I still am not very good at any of the three, but I'm better than I was. And the tools are better than they were. So those two together, we can get it done.
And then the states, obviously, California was the market that I was developed in, particularly Southern California, Los Angeles. So that was going to be a target market because it was the one I knew the best. Now I know both very well and I won't claim to be an expert in Japanese culture, but I, I will say that I'm inclined to be a natural scientist and I'm an observer and I take feedback very well. So, again, I know more than I did before, and I think that what I know, if you said it to native Japanese people, they would agree with, and not just because they want to be polite. So all of that said, what are we building towards? We're building towards long-lasting relationships that get the world connected in the real way. Really, I love love. I love people being happy. I love people doing things together. I love seeing people be happy on the street. I love seeing families, whatever configuration, happiness finds you. I'm happy it found you, every date, one that didn't go to a date too. I'm happy I got to meet that person and hear their story and learn a little bit about them. And a little bit about myself in the process. It's a beautiful thing. It's a rare thing, and it's very hard to do right now. And I believe wholeheartedly, or I wouldn't have done this. That YoYo helps bridge that gap and it helps people and then it gives people that potential and that opportunity. And also enhances the results that those first dates do convert into lasting relationships, not just swipes, which you can't do. And then we get people connected again the real way. Yeah. You know. I love, love. We're going to end on that. That's what we're building towards. More love in the world. Powered by YoYo.